Coming out (over and over again)

[kaberett]

I'm trans: specifically, genderqueer. My pronouns are "they".

I'm queer.

Please feel encouraged to ask questions, this weekend. If you're embarrassed about asking them in public, you can e-mail or PM me and I'll post the answer here.

This is important, because the more you understand the less likely you are to hurt people by fucking up. (I am, of course, assuming good faith; and I do not, of course, speak for everyone who shares identities with me; but I've read a lot and can probably point you in the right direction, and will do my best to explicitly flag up controversies where I'm aware of them.)

Comments

[pretty_panther]

Do they prefer theirselves or themselves if I was making reference in my own journal? I need to hunt down my table again. I had a tumblr post with all the different pronoun lists to stop me getting confused so ofc I lost it and didn't save it. Clever Sam.

I can't think of anything else to ask. I have been trying to read up on things myself because while it is wonderful that some people are happy to answer questions, it is my responsibility to learn really. I will return to browse comments in case someone asks something that I hadn't noticed though :)

[kaberett]

♥

I'm not sure I quite understand the first question -- can you rephrase please?

[pretty_panther]

If I mentioned something you had said, in a post, would themselves or theirselves be the preferred pronoun?

[kaberett]

Ah, thanks.

I would tend to the singular (theirself/themself) but otherwise it is entirely down to your language usage patterns, I think? Like, I would expect "they said it themself" rather than "theirself" but I am not prescriptivist enough to lay down any laws about general situations :-)