In passing--

[kaberett]

It is a delight to me that I had a conversation on Sunday night in which I pointed out to facesfriend that I do not, in point of fact, know them very well -- I started paying any consistent attention to their existence about 6 months ago and we started dating about 4 months ago (which is weird for me; I am really not used to getting to know people by dating them); he looked gently baffled and said he thought that, in fact, I knew him pretty well. I paused. "Okay," I said, "my predictive model for your behaviour is based on a relatively small sample size, and what data I do have isn't necessarily representative." "Right," he said, "that makes sense." Hurrah for human interactions wherein I get to express myself like that and it's just okay; this is, of course, some of why Hel bemoans that there's no way they can ever write dialogue that is an accurate representation of conversations they have with friends, because nobody would believe people talk that way in real life.

(Tangentially relatedly, but only sort of sideways rather than directly: I am having a pretty bad case of the I-am-not-allowed-to-want-things/I-am-not-allowed-to-be-wanteds this week. Not entirely sure why, but it's a thing; sorry if I go a bit spiky and weird on you.)

Comments

[ghoti]

ah, scientists <3

[cadenzamuse]

We believe people talk that way! And I think that's a really helpful way to explain, actually.

[syntaxofthings]

Not a scientist, makes more sense to me than other ways of talking about "knowing" a person.

[cosmolinguist]

I so believe people talk like that! Andrew's similar. Autistic people are the best at explaining. :)

[kaberett]

Except when we get distracted and fail to remember that other people don't share all our context so forget to give All The Information ;)

[flippac]

Hoping this is appropriate: <3

[ex_we935]

That is sort of a wonderful way to describe how well/you don't know somebody, and I'm glad he understood it. :3

(... and yes, I think I can relate to 'not allowed to want things'.)

~K.

[alexseanchai]

Heh, that dialogue is win.

[sfred]

I am pleased that you are (and that I am) in relationships where that sort of conversation is perfectly fine.

I hope the tangent stuff starts to feel easier soon.

[birke]

So I haven't been paying much attention to the pronouns you're using for facesfriend, but switching within one sentence caught my eye. Are they genderfluid? Is that why you go from knowing them to him saying a thing?

[kaberett]

Naw, he's a cis dude, I just tend to they pretty much everyone about 50% of the time (unless I know that the individual's preference is that I not, which is e.g. why I always she my housemate), and I'm talking about him more than about most other people in ways that mean this shows up in written wossnames.

[birke]

I see. :-)

[untonuggan]

They get away with that kind of dialogue in Bones? But yay communication!

[silveradept]

I'm surprised more people don't talk like that - it's informative, accurate, and comprehensive.

[vass]

Hurrah for human interactions wherein I get to express myself like that and it's just okay

YES THIS.

♥