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kaberettCrying a lot, and very easily, at the moment - over A Deeper Season (over halfway through my annual reread) but also over last year's Masterchef final. Can't tell if it's winter starting to get to me or being more okay with "difficult" feelings as a result of counselling, though for all I'm quite literally wailing at the bus-stop it-- doesn't feel like sucking empty sadness; it feels like legitimate response to people handling the genuinely difficult stuff I am currently grappling with. Trust of others and of self; deliberate and loving relinquishing of control; powerlessness and powerfulness; doing all one can in the face of uncertainty; intergenerational interactions; utter commitment to one's goals, with every action carried out with love; respect.
Of course, it might also be displacement of housing stress (still not sorted); but it feels good and cathartic and whole for all that it is devastating.
My brain doesn't seem to want to cooperate beyond reading this evening, but I have done a little work on the paper and a little work on the Python course I am taking (which counts as preparation for the upcoming academic year...).
I'm fragile, I think, but in ways that feel more like tentative new growth than like splintering ice.
Of course, it might also be displacement of housing stress (still not sorted); but it feels good and cathartic and whole for all that it is devastating.
My brain doesn't seem to want to cooperate beyond reading this evening, but I have done a little work on the paper and a little work on the Python course I am taking (which counts as preparation for the upcoming academic year...).
I'm fragile, I think, but in ways that feel more like tentative new growth than like splintering ice.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-13 10:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-13 10:29 pm (UTC)That sounds like a poem in itself.
Hugs?
(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-13 10:31 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-15 01:15 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-13 11:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-15 01:15 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-14 01:18 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-15 01:16 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-14 01:26 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-15 01:16 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-14 01:52 am (UTC)eta: now i'm making noises like a kettle with readyhot water. the cat is a little bit alarmed but the dog is just like "oh this happens constantly; it's okay, cat." to have your care is also the same mug. um, and that made the kettle-noises happen. i don't know; enjoy my nonsense.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-14 12:40 pm (UTC)I am SO GLAD YOU ARE IN MY LIFE you make me SO MUCH BETTER I just
you
♥
(cat! cat. listen to dog. dog knows what is up. also *affectionate headbutt*)
(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-15 01:15 am (UTC)Life of Py
Date: 2013-09-14 08:16 am (UTC)Asked N, who has an errand in Cambridge today.
Re: Life of Py
Date: 2013-09-14 12:39 pm (UTC)Py and mashup
Date: 2013-09-14 12:51 pm (UTC)..Also: if you're still in Cambridge, are you fre for a late lunch?
Re: Py and mashup
Date: 2013-09-14 01:27 pm (UTC)Firtht Python Singular
Date: 2013-09-14 01:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2013-09-16 04:45 pm (UTC)