who only by moving can balance

1. Codeine. (Codeine and HF turn out to be less axiomatically lethal in combination than one might have expected.) Basically: I've been having a pain flare since the middle of last week, to the point that I've gone "fuck it" and am taking maintenance codeine in addition to having upped my paracetamol dose. (I try not to do that because my supply of opiates is Limited, but hey. Sometimes the thing is necessary.)

2. Slightly to my surprise, I am actually bang on where I wanted to be with the ridiculous schedule [image|text], give or take the thing last week with a question mark on it, which I am... impressed by, given (1).

3. jjhunter wrote me a poem, and then wrote another poem that might as well be for me with as many of my buttons as it hits.

4. elisem made more shinies! Hel was over, and we SQUEALED WITH DELIGHT; it was brill. I am particularly coveting Night Protocols, The Idea, Rising, Emergent Properties, and How The Message Travels; I genuinely cannot tell if I want Watching Over The Lines (to go with Keeper of the Lines, about which I have written a tiny short prose poem THING that explained my own psychology to me more than I ever expected), because the wirework is glorious but it's not quite my kind of rock (both in terms of colour and in terms of research). And I'd love to love 'Much Ado About Nothing' As Performed By Fish for all sorts of reasons, including that it's my favourite play, but that one is definitely not something that wants to live with me for all it's glorious.

5. Burnt toffee dark chocolate, and unrelatedly blueberries.

6. Sunshine!

7. Talking to strangers on the bus, with the specific aim of helping lost tourists find a place.

8. P, who I am actually managing to catch up with some, which is great.

9. Watering my plants (the strawberries are trying to strawberry!)

10. Hel-who-came-over, who is coming over regularly on Wednesdays at the moment because housemate has gaming, I do better when I have someone to feed, they like being fed, and there is TV I adore showing people that they're wanting to get caught up on. Today: leftovers of yesterday's All The Minestrone (seriously, about five litres) and also courgette fritters, with wholemeal bread + lemon + lettuce.

I am tired and in pain but I am also happy. It is nice.

My current daily pain relief regime looks a little like this:

mefenamic acid 3x500mg daily
paracetamol 8x500mg daily
buscopan 3x10mg daily

diclofenac gel (as and when)
codeine (as and when)

I've done a shitton today. I've co-run a social; I've done a lot of errands in town; I've hung out with some friends; I've played a game of Scrabble and not done too shabbily; I've turned my mattress and generally reorganised my room a little and done some paperwork.

I've also taken 75mg of codeine, applied the diclofenac gel liberally four or five times, and contemplated faffing around with my TENS machine.

... it's the first proper day of my period and I can DO STUFF. I've been stopped in my tracks by the pain pretty frequently nonetheless, sure, but do you know what? What I HAVEN'T been is curled up miserably in bed all day.

This is kind of magic.