kaberett | vital functions

Reading. Between the World and Me, Ta-Nehisi Coates. I am not the target audience for this book. The framing device is explicitly as a letter to Coates' teenage son. I have at this point ingrained bristling to reader-addressed-as-"you" being assumed male, and I had to talk myself down from it every single time; in a discussion that was absolutely embedded in the body, in which embodiment was central, there was absolutely no meaningful engagement with disability or queerness or transness, in ways that -- because, again, I am not the target audience -- grated. I can see a lot of ways in which this book is valuable and important for its discussion of, specifically, being Black and male in the USA. I'm glad to know more of Coates' story. I will go into the next work of his that I read better braced for... less intersectionality than I'm otherwise accustomed to expect.

NASA just broke the 'Venus curse': here's what it took.

The Bullet Journal Method, Ryder Carroll -- or at least, the first few chapters, available as a sample via my library. I squawked in indignation a lot. Beware incoming angry liveblogging.

The Silmarillion, JRRT. Next step: need to reread the last few chapters and make notes on location names. (Notes is better than social interaction, because I'm more likely to remember.)

Watching. CXG S03E07. Holy shit this is the first ever episode title that doesn't include Josh's name, IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING S03E06 "Josh is Irrelevant". Did they fucking EVER not pull their punches with that.

Beautiful continuity and mirroring, as ever -- SOME DUDE OPENS THE FREEZER DOOR IN A GROCERY STORE. And, of course, I am adoring the echoes of Greg's experience with AA in Rebecca's approach to DBT.

BBC Life: the Challenges of Life. This is a liveblog. You have been warned.

Coast of Florida -- OH THE DOLPHINS THAT DO THE CHASING IN TIDAL AREAS -- oh wait no okay beats tail in silt to make Ring Of Mud around shoal, then they Jump to escape... and land. in dolphin face. ... comfy. Just these bottlenoses! Localised etc!

Kenya - big cats - OOOH some cheetahs have learned to hunt in groups! which lets them take down bigger animals than they'd otherwise manage, because they don't actually have much bulk! A group of THREE.
-- THEY'RE GONNA FUCK UP AN OSTRICH, each of which weighs twice of what they do!
-- male has spotted one-but-only-one of cheetahs and is doin A Threat Display... half-heartedly
-- OH NO THREE OF THEM COMING
-- ostriches have not yet learned to BUNCH UP AND KICK THE SHIT OUT OF THE CHEETAHS

Madagascar - "extraordinary weapons" instead of "brute strength" --
- praying mantis -- cleaning its feets? -- what good aqua-and-green
- But Even They Are Outgunned
- by CHAMELEON - now we are talking about camouflage splendid
-- tongue at 15 m/s what the fUCK it has a GRASPY TUBE this is like everyone's nightmare fleshlight

did u no that The St(e)akes are Higher for PRey which is Life Or Death than for hunters, which is Just One Meal

Antarctica -- spring and summer -
- crabeater seals, which don't actually eat crabs (instead krill) and make Good Noises and go Narm Pile
- yup we're doing the thing of "the mst dangerous point is when you're leaving the ice floe/shore, because Orcas"
- here, many orca pods prey only on fish -- but the one we're being shown specialise in hunting seals
- ... oh no a seal going to open water didn't notice until Oh No, and is now trying to hide behind Small Piece Of Floating Ice
- hi sound track human
- OH NO SEAL DOES ENOUGH OF A DODGE KEEPING CLOSE TO THE TINY ICEBERG THAT THE WHALES GAVE UP
- WHAT A GOOD BOY
- apparently orca are generally MUCH more successful hunting other types of seals, because these ones are Too Damn Fighty

Open ocean - Nowhere To Hide, But Safety In Numbers
-- ... really? that's not what you told US about bait balls
- OOOH FLYING FISH
-- wait hold on we've previously been told that flying fish get eaten by birds
-- they can glide up to 200m!
- okay I am enjoying the epic Noping Animals we're getting here

Many Animals Are Vegetarians
But The Battle BEtween Animals And Plants... Can Also Be Intense
Boa Vista, central Brazil -- weird pitted rocks - SQUAWK - "the legacy of a long struggle between one animal and one plant"
brown tufted capuchins -- sleep in caves overnight, hunt breakfast from nut palms -- huge seeds, very strong shells. so... check which seed is the ripest, then... tear through the husk with teeth; leaves nuts to try for a week in the sun; taps to check if they're ready; grabs HUGE ROCK (that is hard) to SMASH SEEDS AGAINST FIXED ANVIL-ROCK
- TOOL-USING PRIMATES
- *sound-track human*
- OH NO BABIES IMITATE LIKE HUMAN TODDLERS
- OH *NO* SHIT SMOLS. HIT NUT! WITH OTHER NUT! DROP NUT! DROP STONE! BREAK STONE!
- it takes up to eight years to learn how to Do Thing!!!

Oh But *Some* Plants have Turned The Tables and *FEED ON ANIMALS*
- okay yep hi monchy plants (two fine hairs, need to be touched within 20s of each other)
- *sound-effects human*
- yup, venus fly-trap

There's More To Life Than Finding Food
Sometimes You Want To Have Sex
Malaysia - insect that has been dormant in forest floor is... doing an alarming inflate as it hatches
- males climb up trees, hide in leaves, and start to... ... Something? gulps air bubbles into head ACTUAL INFLATION OH FUCK THEN PUMPS THEM INTO STALKS SUPPORTING EYES AND BECOMES A HAMMERHEAD WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK
THEY ARE INDEED NAMED STALK-EYED FLIES BUT *WHAT THE FUCK*
- oh my everloving fuck then they like POLISH their horrifying eyes to make sure they are STRAIGHT and RIGID
- improves ability to spot predators... and is apparently SUPER SEXY (:
- nope nope nope
- .......... widest eyespan gets you the most fuck
- eyes are NOT weapons, but if two males have the same eye-width then a Fight Happens oh no they're waving their front legs at each other in THREAT DISPLAY
- ... until one gives up
- "winner now has the right to wait with *all* the females nearby" [close-up on it rubbing its front legs together]

dry season in Zambia - lagoons baked dry, or mud so thick animals get stuck
- the females that once hung out with this hippo in a small lagoon have all fucked off because Nope
- "he needs water to keep cool... *and* females to mate with" good grief
- All The Ladies have headed off to the Luangwa river, apparently, which is the last place that still has deep water (and some AMAZING meanders)
- This Bend Is Controlled By An All-Powerful Male
- ... that's. A LOT. of hippos. almost all of which are female good grief.
- The Wandering Male Arrives and has to decide whether to submit or fight???
- oh maybe they're not all females? maybe it's just Only This One Hippo Gets To Fuck Around
- DRAMATIC WATERSPRAYS AROUND NOSTRILS
- fuckin' hippos, man (metaphorically).
- The Loser Is Alive But Is An Outcast and retreats to a shallower bit of the river
- No Babs This Season

*sometimes*, *courtship* is the hurdle, not Fighting
- Oregon lakes - grebes - MIRROR DANCE -
- WHAT THE FUCK IS IT DOING WITH ITS HEAD CREST FLATTENED
- ROMANTIC BACKGROUND MUSIC WHILE TWO BIRDS RUN ACROSS THE SURFACE OF THE WATER
- WHAT THE FUCK

KELP FORESTS
OCTOMPUS
(northern Pacific)
... *GIANT* OCTOMPUS! over 4m long!
- Hunting A Den in which to Hide while Babs
-- ... illustrative crab backing into a hole
- oh no she's going to live here for the rest of her life because Octopus :(
- ... lays ~100k eggs
- spends 6 months snoogling them (keeps them free of algae and properly supplied with oxygen, apparently)
- the last thing she does is blow water over the eggs to help them hatch???
- BLOOP
- okay the kelp forests were just for Atmosphere? she was actually in a rock cave

Costa Rica, 30m below forest canopy -- FROB
FROB FROB FROB
strawberry poison arrow frog!!!
GUARD FERTILISED EGGS IN LEAF LITTER
TINY WIGGLY TADPOLE
MOUTH IS COMFY
... *NO ONE TADPOLE CLIMBS ON HER BACK WITH ENCOURAGEMENT*
CLIMBS A TREE
DEPOSITS TADPOLE IN BROMELIAD WATER
... *AND THEN GOES BACK TO REPEAT WITH THE OTHER FIVE*
EACH GOES TO ITS OWN BROMELIAD OH NO!!!!
... But There Is Another Problem
The Pools! Contain! No Food!
... SO SHE LAYS AN UNFERTILISED EGG IN EACH POOL FOR THE TADPOLE TO EAT
... And Then: She Leaves
But One Egg! Won't Sustain! A Growing Tadpole For Long!
... *so she has to return every few days with another*
- close-up on monchy tadpole with FRILLY LITTLE MOUTH
- she does this for TWO WEEKS

[WIND HOWLING]
Birds are also diligent parents!
- oh hold on is this the important Penguin RO-- YES CHINSTRAP PENGUINS
- parent penguins commute daily to open ocean (from Antarctic Peninsula) to acquire Food for Yelly Babs (mouthfuls of krill)
- oh no they are So Roun
- But One Day The Chicks Wait In Vain For Food
- Their Parents Do Not Return
- Oh No
- what... Do???
-- eventually make their own way down to shore on the basis of ????instinct????
- they are already squidgy and fat good
- OH NO THEY'RE JUST AS SHIT AS GROWN-UPS EXCEPT THEY DON'T KNOW HOW TO SWIM YET SO THEY'RE *EVEN MORE SHIT*
- oh no the bay has been choked with an ice slick because change in wind... and the chicks are VERY SMOL and have NO IDEA WHAT DO
- "tries skittering over the top while the others watch"
- ... leopard seal :(
- so others try getting out while it's distracted
- poor brave bab :(
... OH NO IN OPEN WATER THEY DO THE SPLOOTY ARCING JUMP LIKE DOLPHIN???

hello orang-utan! who spends 8 years bringing up baby!!!
- yes lots of excellent Bab that is Very Recognisably an Ape Bab

ON LOCATION
- filming over 3 years, visiting every continent, of which the most challenging was (surprise) Antarctica
- Deception Island -- 2 people and 200k penguins spent a month camping
- DRILLED THROUGH ICE (well science did) to explore STARMFISH
- "the hardest and most ambitious shoot involved four film crews, a celebrated French yachtsman, and the ministry of defence"
-- two months to film Antarctica's two top predators in action
- Jerome Poncet skippered first yacht south of the Antractic circle, and has been doing it for 35 years -- his yacht is NOT AN ICEBREAKER
- okay, so, Rosenthal island for PENGUINS
- ... leopard seals have mouths that can open nearly 180deg, with teeth larger than a lions :|
- leopard seal. puts its face. Entirely In The Camera. Are you... Fren? are you... Dinner? ... OH. REFLECTION IN CAMERA LENS
- finding OTHER top predator is going to be ANOTHER MATTER ENTIRELY -- in that v little is known about Antarctic orcas.
-- hi HMS Endurance -- the Royal Navy's Ice Patrol ship
-- with just. TWO ENTIRE LYNX HELICOPTERS (used to assist the BAS and the Hydrographic Office)
-- no prior success at filming orcas hunting off the Antarctic Peninsula!

Leverage: Redemption, S01E01. I am SO OVER Nate. SO OVER. The upside of this season was NO NATE -- AND YET. NATE.

That aside: I am adoring the quiet obvious OT3ing (Elliott! Makes Hardison!!! A beautifully-plated Vitamins Fruit Dish for his hangover!), and Parker's autistic DELIGHT about the PRESENT that Hardison got her; I am amused that Sophie didn't call the rest of them out more on their obvious egregious set-up of her; and also fondness at how stunningly little sense any of it makes if you, y'know, think about it for more than about fifteen seconds.

Playing. This week I have (for reasons) been doing my honking with a mute in! And have been cheered by the rapid progression from "wow, this is a mess" to "huh, this is basically functional" -- so HURRAH for ongoing skill development.

Creating. I continue to play with lettering, and have settled on (yet another) new numbering style. I finished my previous pen full of ink so got to START MY TROUBLEMAKER STARRY NIGHT BLUE (see also). I am pleased to report that despite a bunch of grumping about them on the internet, the Starry Night Blue in a TWSBI Diamond 580 with 1.1mm stub nib showed no ghosting, no bleed-through, and minimal feathering in an Archer & Olive notebook. (Lettersssss.)

Growing. This week, I have harvested about 2kg of redcurrants. There are... more. to come. And I haven't even started on the jostaberry yet. And the gooseberries are getting there!

Outside: sweetcorn are getting rapidly taller but I suspect I'm going to have to put up canes for the Cosse Violette to climb anyway (but those ARE all coming up and AREN'T all getting eaten by [whatever], so maybe I'll try putting some more peas in that bed as well, sigh, given that even the ones I planted out at ~12" tall are getting Consumed). Second sowing of fennel is germinating, but I'm annoyed by the total evaporation of all of the first sowing, even the one that managed a Proper Leaf. Oca continue cheerful. I found the ants. I have potted up the Chaenomeles japonica courtesy of my mother, and put a hat on the lovage in the hope that this too will discourage Monching. We have had a strawberry off the patio; I'm trying to work out where to plant some baby plants at the allotment. And the sage has self-seeded, and that is going to wind up in the awkward bit of verge once I've... caught up with the Ribes various.

Inside, various: the tomatoes need to go out. The aubergine are Thinking Real Hard and probably need potting up. The tomatoes need me to decide where I'm putting them and then put them there. Cucumbers, chillis, and the one (1) single solitary squash I managed to hatch are... coming along. Fingers crossed for the squash Making It.

I have not yet caved and bought myself seeds for a bunch of decorative succulents.

Observing. BAT bat bat bat bat bat, two fox at once, and... we are up to ten snails, because when I sat down in front of Leverage last night, with A and a tub of redcurrants that needed processing, I wound up finding... two tiny snails I had inadvertently brought home that are, apparently, Ours Now. We... still know the whereabouts of one of them. (They both... fit through the air holes in the snail tank. At least until we've fed them up a bit more.) I am enjoying them all a great deal.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

harpers_child

So the zoo where I live has a fairly well established group of lady orangutans and rotates through gentlemen as the SSP demands. The last time they re-did the orangutan enclosure they put in a section of floor to ceiling windows (with a sprayer above on the human side and a button on the orangutan side so the orangutans could handle unruly spectators) and the eldest lady likes to bring over her babies to show them human babies and since she's eldest all the younger ladies have picked up the habit as well. I thought you needed this information. Some of my favorite zoo moments are watching babies of two species play with each other through that window while the parents on either side watch.