[perfume] Bulgari Black

[kaberett]

That One Lady brought her bottle of it along this evening for me to make friends with.

I think it is important that I tell you that normally, she eats spiky. She eats spiky and turns it smooth and sweet and smiley and lovely. Vetiver won't hold on her. Nothing will hold on her.

This is not, in general, at all true of me.

Nonetheless, on TOL Bulgari Black ends up somewhere that she describes as "High Femme Drag".

About this perfume, rydra_wong says:

... this doesn't seem to be stocked in department stores at all here, but is splendidly cheap to buy online. And it has a marvellously tactile bottle, simple and heavy and coated in matte black rubber. And it's another fun one for bizarre reviews; it's notorious for its "burnt rubber" note (anyone who secretly enjoys the smell of petrol at gas stations, this is your scent), but the intense smokiness is derived partly from tea (Lapsang Souchong), and it's also extremely wearable.

In many ways it's close to Dzing!, but the burnt rubber/smoky tea is more upfront (versus Dzing!'s discreet Bandaid note, its ginger/saffron strangeness), and it then turns into a plainer, richer vanilla (whereas Dzing! has vanilla in it but dries down to more of a thin sweet wood/musk). Leather coupled with rubber, obviously. Comfortable kink.

And vass adds to the conversation. The notes of this perfume are, in theory, lapsang souchong, rosewood, bergamot, cedar wood, oak moss, vanilla, amber, sandalwood and musk.

On me, it starts out smelling unabashedly and unavoidably of vodka. No, really, someone opened a bottle of really expensive vodka and let it infuse the air.

And then after five minutes they tipped a bottle of cheap vanilla essence into it.

After ten minutes, it is briefly acrid and smoky, and after half an hour? Pure unadulterated vanilla biscuits, warm out of the oven and satisfyingly buttery, all the way down. Forever.

I WISH TO FILE A COMPLAINT THIS IS NOT HOW THIS IS SUPPOSED TO WORK ;_;

Comments

[frith_in_thorns]

I keep reading your perfume posts and going "but I don't understaaaaand", I thought you buy a perfume that's labelled, like, APPLE, and you put it on you and then you smell LIKE AN APPLE! I think my brain just keeps short-circuiting at the alternative workings you relate XD

I really need an icon of someone looking COMPLETELY BEFUDDLED.

[kaberett]

neeeeeeeeeerd alert!

OKAY SO yes if you buy something labelled "apple" then you will probably end up smelling like apples BUT

nobody actually understands how smell works. We can point at specific compounds and say "that smells like this" or "xyz in combination in the right proportions smell like a, b or c" but we don't know how it works.

Now. Add in the fact that people's skins are different. In perfume fandom we talk about "skin chemistry" - there's what actually happens in the bottle (this is why reviews often take the in the vial-wet on the skin-during drydown format, because it lets you know whether you're perceiving the original scent in the same ways as the reviewer - like, if they say "licorice" and all you're getting in the bottle is "strawberries", then the formula's changed or they've aged differently or you're anosmic to different things or....), and then there's the WEIRD SHIT THAT GOES ON WHEN YOU PUT IT ON SKIN.

Like, to the extent that some people can put the same perfume on both their left and their right wrists, and it will end up smelling perceptibly different on each.

The more notes in a scent - the more complex it is - the more likely it is that you're going to "amp"[lify] something in particular, or dull it down to nothing, or just turn it weird, or whatever. For example, no matter what else is in a BPAL perfume, if it contains their cinnamon note, the perfume will just... smell like cinnamon on me. Pure cinnamon. Nothing else will get through, no matter how much variety is in there. And their "snow/ice" note (which people give rapturous reviews) turns into overpowering motorway service-station toilet-cleaner on me, every single time. (I also amp BPAL white musk into something crystalline and razor-sharp, but that I'm okay with, because the glints in the blade are the other notes in the perfume ;) ).

basically CHEMISTRY IS AWESOME I MISS ORGANIC CHEMISTRY and if you want me to clarify any of this ask and I'll give it a go in the morning ;)

[jelazakazone]

Have you read The Emperor of Scent?

[kaberett]

Nope, but I take it I should :-)

[jelazakazone]

Definitely! It was written by a journalist about a guy who is obsessed with scent. It was a fascinating read. I forget the people's names, but really, you should read it.

[rydra_wong]

The journalist is Chandler Burr, and the scientist dude is Luca Turin, who's also a highly opinionated and splendidly snarky perfume reviewer -- he co-wrote Perfumes: The A-Z Guide with Tania Sanchez, and I've ended up quoting them a fair few times in my posts.

[kaberett]

Brill, thanks :-)

[jelazakazone]

Thank you for coming up with all the details!

The way Burr writes it, I was captivated by Turin. DH really enjoyed the book too. He might have been the one who told me to read it in the first place, actually.

[rydra_wong]

Even if you don't wear any scents, if you liked Turin I'd rec Perfumes: The A-Z Guide as a hugely entertaining read.

Especially when you're watching Turin and Sanchez snap under the strain of reviewing yet another appalling generic white floral and become magnificently snarky. Their opinionatedness is glorious (even when they're hating on some scents I love -- it's one of those books that's just as much fun to disagree with). *g*

[jelazakazone]

I take it Perfumes doesn't really have a narrative story, right?

I wonder what ever happened to Turin. Last I'd heard, he'd actually moved to the States, pretty close to where I am now...

[rydra_wong]

No narrative -- there are a couple of introductory essays on different aspects of perfume, and then it's reviews arranged in alphabetical order.

But it's a fine book for dipping into for a moment of entertainment, or when you're too tired for something that involves following a sustained narrative (I've found it good reading when the brainweasels are attacking).

[jelazakazone]

Mmm, sounds like a delightful end!

I don't wear any scents. Most of them drive me nuts and dh doesn't like them either.

[kaberett]

It's certainly pleasant, but I can get it cheaper ways than niche perfumery!

[jelazakazone]

Oooooh. Got it! I can be clueless sometimes. Like, always :D

[kaberett]

nw!

[vass]

Oh perfumes. :D: They're like cats: mind of their own.

Such a strange artform.