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kaberettnot braining content notes for this but There Are Some
Things that have happened today:
I'm increasingly anxious about not having done much actual project-based PhD work At All yet this week: The Thing I did on Monday was phone the DWP (plus bonus anxiety-inducing accounts-wrangling); Tuesday got thoroughly derailed by the aforementioned RTA; today ended up Difficult because of all of the above plus some scheduling misc.
I'm wishing I felt able to go "here's a copy of the letter the GIC sent me, here's bullet points I want turned into actual sentences, Please Make A Letter Happen" but I... don't, for a variety of reasons. That + cancelled-therapy + general miasmic anxiety is doing a bit of a number on me; I am bored of feeling isolated and afraid and adrift.
Stubborn positivity:
Things that have happened today:
- I received an unexpected phone call from an unknown number that turned out to be the driver-at-fault in the minor road accident we were witnesses to yesterday morning (and ended up calling in the cops on because the driver-at-fault was escalating rapidly with a lot of violent threats); he wanted to apologise to me. Is this witness tampering? WHO KNOWS. Something to add to the list of things to actually tell the police should they get in touch to take a proper statement.
- I did a bunch of wrangling and finally set up the work VPN, so that I could submit an incident report (at the request of my PIs) about a member of security staff walking all the way into a restricted-access clean room with his horrible outside shoes on in order to try to hassle me to leave the building that I was in legitimately... at 11:30pm... in mid-February. So that was a source of several stress.
- I have started drafting a letter to the GIC about the absolute bullshit that was my last appointment and the charming follow-up letter they sent. I am miserable and furious about this.
- I need to actually write the sweet charming perky e-mail to my gym asking if it would be helpful for me to write to their head office requesting more funding so that they can make the accessible changing room even remotely usable.
- my therapist e-mailed apologising about Still Being Ill and asking if we could postpone the session we should have had last Friday until next week. (it's good that they e-mailed before I managed to get to prompting them! but also that's A Thing.)
- I'm even managing to feel super overwhelmed by the number of books in my stack -- two holds came through today, which is Poor Timing given my general degree of focus and grip.
I'm increasingly anxious about not having done much actual project-based PhD work At All yet this week: The Thing I did on Monday was phone the DWP (plus bonus anxiety-inducing accounts-wrangling); Tuesday got thoroughly derailed by the aforementioned RTA; today ended up Difficult because of all of the above plus some scheduling misc.
I'm wishing I felt able to go "here's a copy of the letter the GIC sent me, here's bullet points I want turned into actual sentences, Please Make A Letter Happen" but I... don't, for a variety of reasons. That + cancelled-therapy + general miasmic anxiety is doing a bit of a number on me; I am bored of feeling isolated and afraid and adrift.
Stubborn positivity:
- A came home via the big supermarket the other evening, bearing gifts: specifically, cut-price nonsense geometric chocolates in a variety of flavours. I had in fact been eyeing that very box up every time I went past and feeling like I couldn't possibly justify getting it, so it was a Very Nice Surprise.
- Movement: my knee is still coping with increased resistance + cardio at gym, and I'm starting to feel like I'm getting meaningful exercise out of it, as well as increased stability/physio work.
- Kew is putting on a massive bullshit sculpture trail this summer, which I found out yesterday, and I am really looking forward to it. I am intending to make at least one evening-opening visit, along with hopefully multiple daytime visits. (Specifically, it's bullshit abstract glass sculpture by the dude responsible for the V&A chandelier, which I'm enormously fond of.)
- I have used up all the ravioli filling... and still have an eighth of the dough left, so that's going to get turned into another batch of tagiatelle, I think. (Dinner was ravioli. It was good.)
- M posted new fic and I spent Some Time rolling around in it and asking yet more questions.
- A is making great strides towards (i) sorting the Piles such that we can meaningfully get rid of them and (ii) putting things on Freegle (after Freecycle didn't bite). Order is emerging from chaos and it is doing my brain a good.
- I managed to leave the house today while it was actually still light -- down to the end of the road for a Pokémon raid (hiiii Shinx). AND on the way back from the gym we got a NEW SPECIES, which, yes hurrah good there had never previously been one of those spawned that I could actually get to.
- w8rose does a raspberry-and-passion-fruit cheesecake, it's currently cut price, and it's exactly what I wanted.
- I do in fact have a bunch of useful How To Humaning-related expertise, and I am in fact managing to help people make their lives better using it, and they are in fact learning principles and frameworks from me such that they can work more of this shit out for themselves independently, and I am pretty fuckin' proud of them.
- I am, very shortly, going to go curl up in a bed that doesn't actively hurt me, underneath an anger blanket, with a hot water Adam, and I am going to sleep.
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Date: 2019-03-20 11:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 01:55 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 02:42 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 08:05 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 09:08 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 09:09 am (UTC)(mostly I'm still quite ... about having learned, a few years ago now, that mobiles -- as in, the decorative twirly things you hang above cots as enrichment for babies -- are a modern art invented by Alexander Calder in the recent past.)
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Date: 2019-03-21 09:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 09:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 12:32 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 12:35 pm (UTC)Thank you <3
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Date: 2019-03-21 02:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 04:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 04:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-03-21 04:43 pm (UTC)ISN'T HE. You're very welcome. :D