In the process of writing up some overdue therapy notes, I had a realisation

[kaberett]

Specifically, the ableist issues with metaphorical deployment of "using something as a crutch" are well-documented. FwD suggests the alternative "training wheels", which never really worked for me; something about the connotations, I think.

I've just noticed that "using ... as a buttress" really does: while buttresses are reassuring and nice to look at, they fundamentally arise because we didn't understand physics so couldn't build things that stayed up without them. As we've deepened and developed our understanding of the world and our place in it they become superfluous: there are less visible and more efficient ways to achieve the same effect, but they require thought and work.

Which has a different flavour, to me, around whether there's an expected stepping stone to build confidence (as training wheels so often are), or whether one is fundamentally struggling to replace a maladaptive approach that was the best that could be done at the time but has been rendered obsolete, if you can get the budget and the time and the support to do the upgrade work.

Comments

[redsixwing]

/oh/

And a buttress is something load bearing, that should not be removed without due consideration for what may be damaged by simply deciding to live without it.

[kaberett]

Yup! Precisely!

[redsixwing]

Yay! \o/

today is a day for realizations.

[kaberett]

plus, you know, BONUS ARCHITECTURE, what's not to like!

[chiasmata]

Genius!

[damerell]

"Training wheels" are also an awkward metaphor because they're actively undesirable - since I was young we've rediscovered how the Victorians learned to ride bicycles (take off pedals, saddle down [1], scoot like hobby horse until you get the balance) and it works much better.

[1] obviously you don't learn on a full-size Ordinary. :-)

[kaberett]

Ha, yes!

[sebenikela]

oohhhh i LIKE this

because also e.g. Notre Dame is not a bad building because it uses buttresses, and that has potential as a brain-wrangling metaphor (I am not a bad person because I use XYZ, etc.)

[kaberett]

yes exactly <3

[sebenikela]

oooh oooh oooh! AND: If the buttresses WORK, you don't have to replace them--not every building has to be the most modern and efficient ever. It's just when they get in the way of your garden or some new building, or they stop working and the wall becomes unstable, or they're damaged and you have to repair stuff ANYWAY, then you can replace them with something that works better.

(i enjoy (over)extending metaphors)

[jesse_the_k]

Yesssssssss!

Now I want to get a YouTuber to make a great video illustrating the differences between training wheels and buttresses.

[alatefeline]

Thank you! That's a good metaphor for me to use for internal processing, too, though I think it would take some explaining for me to share it with anyone. That is, if it is okay to copypasta it to my brain?

I am fond of the educational terminology/metaphor of scaffolding for learning or accomplishing a procedure. Though I mostly use it with my internal process of building and reworking active routines, and those go up and down fast enough I sometimes use computer file metaphors instead.

I'm especially fond of this bit >> if you can get the budget and the time and the support to do the upgrade work << because in my experience that has often been the real issue, not the presence or absence of a dozen or so functional upgraded blueprints to choose from.

[kaberett]

please by all means do copypasta. <3

That is how I use "scaffolding", yup -- as a framework for me to build better behavioural habits around.

<3

[sasha_feather]

Oh hey, that's my article from back in the day! I'm so glad to see that it is still getting linked and read. I like your suggestion for buttresses. Wonderful.

[kaberett]

Hee, yes, I noticed the familiar name! To be clear, I do not mean to be generally critical of you & "training wheels" -- just that it doesn't work terribly well for me, so Bonus Architecture, though I also note that it's taken me how many years to come up with something I like better, so I admire you all the more for that ;)

[sasha_feather]

Oh no problem! I don't think I've ever even used the "training wheels" metaphor in real life. Just something I thought of at the time.

[silveradept]

Buttress sounds like a very useful word to use in this situation, and in plenty of other ones, too, when talking about the things we built to protect ourselves when we didn't have any better things at our disposal.