The problem it runs into is the problem with defining any gender category firmly which is . . . . nobody actually agrees, 100%, on what gender actually is.

I mean Gomez Addams is an amazing role model: but basically every single one of those things except specifically identifying as a man . . . also apply to me! Who is definitely not, in any way, a man.

I would also occasionally swashbuckle, would be desperately in love with (and prone to dramatic gestures with) any spouse I had, am devoted sibling and would be a devoted parent etc etc etc.

I would actually even own a smoking jacket!

But none of those things can be said to be "masculine", inherently.


You'd have the same difficulty trying to define "feminist femininity", though. Because I guarantee there are a crapload of things that one would dump into "feminine" that I am not (while of course also having some things I both would hold onto unto the death and . . . . to which I can point to equivalences in men I know).

Which is where we end up back with our host at " . . .that's . . . just being a balanced and adult human being?"