kaberett: Overlaid Mars & Venus symbols, with Swiss Army knife tools at other positions around the central circle. (Default)
[personal profile] kaberett
... by request of [personal profile] sebastienne. I haven't written this one up because it basically arose from me pointing out to an ex-housemate that it was fine that we were out of spice mix, we did in fact have all the components and could recombine things ourselves adjusted to taste.

Miscellaneous misc
8 large tortillas (this is, conveniently, one pack in the UK)
a small pile of grated cheese

Tomato misc
LIMES. I like 3, A prefers none, we tend to end up at 1.5.
A Thing of passata (jars are ~600ml or Tetrapaks are ~500ml, it doesn't really matter which)
chilli to taste (I tend to use a mixture of dried ancho chillis + chilli flakes + occasionally a bit of cayenne)
Mixed Dried Herbs (because oregano and we have a pack to use up)

Filling misc
a couple of tablespoons of oil
2tbsp ground cumin
2tbsp ground coriander
2tsp (yes that's different) paprika (I like smoked, A emphatically does not)
1 large onion, chopped into large-ish cubes depending on your preferred texture
3-6 cloves of garlic, minced (depending on taste)
about a thumb of root ginger, minced
mince of your preference (we normally use frozen Quorn mince, typically the 300g bags but sometimes the 500g bags depending on what was cheaper)
a couple of roughly-chopped peppers (this is an EXCELLENT way to use up green peppers)
Optionally A Courgette (chopped into cubes)
Optionally Whatever Other Chilli Ingredients You Think Are A Good Idea


Method

Pre-heat oven to 200degc, at some point, according to how long your oven takes to heat up.

Zest the lime(s) into a small pan; add chilli and passata. Halve and juice the limes; use the juice to rinse the end of the tomato out of the passata container and into the saucepan. Set over low heat while you do everything else.

Toast the spices in a large dry frying pan over medium-high heat; once aromatic add the oil/onion/garlic/ginger. Fry until softened, then add the mince. Cook until most of the way to browned; add the peppers (and any other vegetables). (You can add them sooner but I do them here because I like them to retain some crunchiness.)

Once the mince is Cooked To Taste, turn off all the heat. Add somewhere between a couple of ladlefuls and half the lime-passata to the mince, stirring well to combine; it should all absorb, get more flavourful, and leave you with a fairly dry mince mix.

Get out your roasting dish, oil it lightly if you can face the hassle, and then place the tortillas in it next to each other, folded in half. You are going for a Sydney Opera House sort of an effect.

Put about an eighth of the mince mixture in the middle of each tortilla; once you've got to the end, redistribute as seems appropriate so each is approximately equally filled. Now work from end to end, wrapping them up into rolls and working the final edge round to the bottom. You should end up with eight happy tortilla canneloni.

Pour the rest of the tomato sauce over the top and distribute across the whole. I like leaving the ends un-sauced so that they go crunchy and provide a textural contrast.

Dump the grated cheese reasonably evenly over the top. (We use vintage cheddar, because of course we do.)

Bung in the oven for 15-30 minutes, until the edges have gone crunchy and the cheese is as done as you want it to be.

If you've used a stoneware roasting dish and haven't bothered oiling it, this will serve much more easily if you leave it to cool for ten minutes after removing it from the oven.

We tend to serve with white-folk guacamole & soured cream, & additional salad bits if we're feeling enthusiastic.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-17 10:08 pm (UTC)
jesse_the_k: Muppet's Swedish chef brandishes cleaver and spoon with rooster at side (grandiloquent cook is grandiloquent)
From: [personal profile] jesse_the_k
I just want to compliments you on the economy & practicality f using lime juice as a can rinse.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-17 11:06 pm (UTC)
niqaeli: cat with arizona flag in the background (my kitty brethren)
From: [personal profile] niqaeli
I'm sorry, I might be being Highly Arizonan rn, but I am trying to figure out what white folk guac even is. What does it omit?? JalapeƱo bits, I'd guess but those are always variable-quantity-to-taste anyway? Everything else is sort of vital for it to be actual guac! You could sub onion powder for onion proper but like. I can't... honestly imagine what else is omittable? O.o

I mean unless you mean the pre-packaged, sealed stuff! Which can be a little sad, true, but are generally still šŸ„‘-y, and I admit I will use at home sometimes because I can't always be arsed to find ripe avocados at the store and mash them + juice limes. (I never buy onion, tomato, etc. separately to make guac, I just buy pre-made fresh pico de gallo but I recognise the fact that i can do so is proooooobably bc I live in Arizona.).

Also, no judgment ANYWAY because eat what works for you on a spoons/enjoyment level! But also even if you WANTED to make from scratch I suspect finding avocados that aren't terrible on the wet island you live on is not that much easier than finding them in Finland. (I know an ex-pat American who grew up in Florida who now lives in Finland. Proper, worthwhile avocados are one of the foods she deeply misses.)
Edited (paragraph breaks are good /o\) Date: 2017-05-17 11:08 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 09:13 am (UTC)
niqaeli: cat with arizona flag in the background (Default)
From: [personal profile] niqaeli
...mayonnaise??

I'll just. Be over here having a fit of vapors.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 10:54 am (UTC)
niqaeli: cat with arizona flag in the background (Default)
From: [personal profile] niqaeli

I did! I totally did. I was just not prepared for quite that level of white-peopleness.

Your iteration didn't actually sound unreasonable to start with I mean none of those adaptations are, like, ridiculous? But also, apparently, there's the possibility of MAYONNAISE. The mayo business is white people guac! Yours is just house-adapted.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-19 12:37 am (UTC)
niqaeli: cat with arizona flag in the background (Default)
From: [personal profile] niqaeli
still not over this. i guess there is truly nothing white people will not ruin with mayo.

for contrast this is the pre-packaged stuff in my fridge right now:



NOTE THE TOTAL LACK OF EGGS OR OIL OR DAIRY OF ANY KIND. because this is still something that can call itself guacamole, even if it's the slightly crappy grocery store version, and not weirdo white people avocado-flavoured mayo.

(actually tbh I would probably wouldn't hate a properly done avocado aioli, but I am positive I'd hate whatever it is they're passing off as guacamole over there.)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-22 07:17 pm (UTC)
azurelunatic: Homosexuality is an abomination unto the Lord. Here are some equal abominations according to the Bible. Quote one, quote (abomination)
From: [personal profile] azurelunatic
I had seen guac versions that included sour cream BUT HOLY HANNAH NOT MAYO WHAT

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 02:18 pm (UTC)
sporky_rat: A black bird on blue sky looking at a half moon (just total wack)
From: [personal profile] sporky_rat
...... This reminds me of the discussion I had when I found someone with putting jambalaya in the oven covered in cheese.
Oven, okay, yeah, you want to keep it warm for a bit, sure.
Cheese?!

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 10:24 pm (UTC)
alexseanchai: Purple lightning (Default)
From: [personal profile] alexseanchai
...jambalaya.

...cheese.

MY GULF COAST SOUL IS VERY OFFENDED RIGHT NOW.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-23 05:50 pm (UTC)
sporky_rat: Miss Parker from Pretender (you have got to be fucking kidding me)
From: [personal profile] sporky_rat
It was so spicy-hot that only four of us could eat it, too. It was not tasty and it was horrible.

(But it was calories that I didn't have to cook after working all day.)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 11:02 am (UTC)
tree_and_leaf: Isolated tree in leaf, against blue sky. (Default)
From: [personal profile] tree_and_leaf
UK white people pre-packaged guacamole is usually a significant percentage mayonnaise

Yes. It's disgusting.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 08:19 pm (UTC)
ghoti_mhic_uait: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ghoti_mhic_uait
Wow, I have just looked at the ingredients in guac from Morrisons. It has cream in. Or it's Yarden, whch is a Nestle brand, and is made from avocado, garlic an preservatives. El Paso has cream cheese in. No wonder it tastes weird!

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-19 07:28 am (UTC)
swingandswirl: (facepaw)
From: [personal profile] swingandswirl
... I'm not sure which part of me is more horrified, the (admittedly non-Latina) brown part or the part that spent two years in CA with excellent homemade guac. Mayo, seriously? (Dear Brits: stop giving the world JUSTIFICATION when it rants about your crappy food.)

I agree with Niq, your version is a perfectly decent house variant. This mayo business... then again, given what your island does to Indian food I am not surprised.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-19 10:33 am (UTC)
forthwritten: looking up through a tree's branches and leaves against a blue sky (the trees they grow high)
From: [personal profile] forthwritten
There is currently an advert on TV for some kind of yoghurty/soft cheese thing and they ACTUALLY ADVERTISE putting it in guacamole. These people are savages.

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-19 05:01 pm (UTC)
forests_of_fire: A picture of a brilliantly colored waterfall cascading into a river (Default)
From: [personal profile] forests_of_fire
+1 to the HORROR of having mayo in guacamole!

(And I am White People enough that I like mayo.)

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-18 09:15 am (UTC)
sebastienne: My default icon: I'm a fat white person with short dark hair, looking over my glasses. (Default)
From: [personal profile] sebastienne
Thank youuuuuu

(no subject)

Date: 2017-05-23 06:00 pm (UTC)
killing_rose: Vala: WTF? (WTF?)
From: [personal profile] killing_rose
I realize I am terribly late to the party, and that my 'guac' is mostly lime juice and avocado unless I am having a damn good week when it comes to managing food and spice, or I've gone ahead and bought store brand guac. But mayo. Cream cheese. Cream. What the ever loving fuck is wrong with these people?

*In my defense, I didn't eat an avocado that had actually ripened naturally or wasn't unripe or wasn't half-to-rot until college, though somehow Alaskan Mexican restaurants do make good guac, hell knows how (and we'll not point out that half of the restaurants are run by Asian immigrants or Pacific Islanders).

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kaberett: Overlaid Mars & Venus symbols, with Swiss Army knife tools at other positions around the central circle. (Default)
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